Thursday 2 February 2012

You will not enjoy this.

300 (2006)

Another myspace review (if I haven't been clear these are taken from a period when I did a small write-up for every film I saw at the cinema and posted) chosen because I liked the last line and reprinted as was despite some sloppiness to it.

THIS!   WAS!   A!   MOST!   PAINFULLY!   IRRITATING!   FILM! WHERE!  EVERYONE! SPEAKS! LIKE! THIS!!!!!
In the interests of full disclosure I should point out I pretty much knew before I saw this that it was going to annoy me.
The stark (or indeed, dare I say, spartan) visuals left me cold during the trailer and reviews I read (most enthusiastically positive) led me to believe i wouldn't like this.
And I was right.
But what I wasn't prepared for was for just how boring i would find it. It seemed to take a long time to get going and when the battle finally starts its a curiously dull affair despite the limbs flying and the men shouting (a lot- have i mentioned that?), momentarily enlivened only by excrutiatingly awful fight banter.
It's political subtext is troubling to say the least (and that's ignoring any historical innacuracies as this is myth making and facts don't matter too much) and since i wasn't being engaged by the actual text i was thinking alot about this perhaps in a way to amke it more interesting than it actually is.
It also has one of the stupidest sex scenes i've seen in a while (but i do give the filmmamkers points for hiring an actress who seems to have the Frank Miller style chunky nipples - now thats faith to the source material for you).

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